This is the time of year for tradition and the tradition in e-commerce is to bombard any email addresses you happen to have with promotional material. In that spirit may I present some seasonal prints for your
evidication edificeat mild irritation.
With snow and whatforth the first 2 are clearly so christmassy that they should put you in a very festive mood indeed. The third one, it may surprise you to hear, is hanging at this very moment in the V&A museum in the heart of London’s South Kensington (red light) district as part of ‘Private Eye : The First 50 Years‘ which runs until 8th of Jan.
These 3 prints, signed and numbered, I am offering, and it breaks my heart to do so (it doesn’t), at the cut price rate of £30.
And this here link should speed you to my cartoon megastore
May your ding dongs ding merrily on high.
Happy London Fashion Week. Here’s to catwalks full of bloomers.
You can see this and lots more of Zebedee’s wonderful cartoons right here
Click here to see more marvelous cartoons and hilarious things
We will be posting lots more brilliant cartoons from Zebedee Helm over the coming weeks.
They are all available to buy from his online shop.
Click here to be redirected immediately.
The problem of bikinis slipping off when enjoying a dive into water is not one that is exclusive to women. As a man it happens too, although it is often not a bikini but the male swimming costume (trunks) which come down and expose the white male rump and ding dong. Don’t think you can trick gravity by pulling the drawstring really tight before diving either, it just makes them harder to pull up again. For those of you who are interested in damage limitation and don’t want to frighten the children, the trick is to catch your trunks before they come entirely right off and then try to re-position them when you are still under the water. Of course this isn’t always possible and if you find yourself starting to drown then abandon the manoeuvre, it is not worth dying for. The thing of it is however, that when your trunks do shoot off you are reminded how much nicer it feels to swim without them in the first place.
I’ve just remembered that this is predominantly a fashion blog and so herewith is a description of the trunks that presently encumber my socks, pants and trunks drawer. Don’t worry this won’t take long I only have three pairs, or a pair of pairs and one more pair, whichever is clearer. Pair one (1) are green and baggy and floppy and I bought them in India for 1 Rupee (for those of you unfamiliar with the currency this is very cheap) Unfortunately they smell very strongly of stale sulphur. This is because I went into a hot sulphur spring in Italy and didn’t wash them out afterwards. People grimace if I swoosh past them wearing these ones, so they are for emergencies only now. Pair two are from a little known fashion boutique called Gap which is in Cheltenham. They are red shorts with white piping. Unfortunately the white piping is now incredibly filthy and grey. I don’t know how they got like this as they are only worn in water, which is what you clean things in, and yet they are dirty and it won’t scrub out, which is mysterious as well as annoying. These are my main pair. Pair three are Burberry ones which I bought ironically. They are very tight and not flattering at all, particularly when exiting the water, or lounging about. Also no one apart from me thinks they are funny, so they rarely get worn. To conclude this essay on the male trunks costume, I would recommend wherever possible to dispense with them entirely and if you are nice and thin, go for a skinny dip, and if you are large, a fatty dip.
Editor’s note : If you would like to know more about the wonderful world of Zebedee Helm then you must visit his website HERE. You can also purchase his fabulous cartoons, drawings and paintings and read his brilliant blog.